Three Cats' Haunting Harmony
November 17, 2023 - story concept by me, executed by ChatGPT, basically a true story with a happier ending than irl
Am I A Writer?
My paternal grandfather (Papa) was an English Professor at the University. He bought me the first two Harry Potter books when I was young - I remember that I wasn't super interested in reading them. After I watched the first two movies, I started reading them. I'm not sure if that's where my love of reading began, but it's the earliest memory I can currently bring forth about how I started to immerse myself in the fantasy worlds of book series. I loved Septimus Heap, Charlie Bone, and Warriors - a lot of books about powerful boys. Anyway, I have always had the ability to write well, but I didn't love writing (other than in my Diary) because the only writing I did was for school - forced. This is me falling in love with a different variety of structured and creative writing for myself. Enjoy. <333
Bloggy
I love to delve into my psyche and the depths of human experience, exploring themes of darkness, shame, codependency, spirituality, death, loss, grief. I hope to offer solace, both to myself and to others, through making visible my internal struggles and narrative as well as a feeling of connection to the natural and unseen worlds. Astral Travel with me.
Stories
Ephemeral & Cadence - Chapter One Lmao
Cadence feels her lungs expand, hit a peak, and then recede. As she looks from atop the ridge, the tides seem to follow her now rhythmic inhales and exhales - or is it the other way around? The Angel snaps herself back to the present moment, steadying herself as her eyes focus back to the battle at hand. Others' hands. The sounds of clashing metal, both high pitched and dull, alternating with seemingly no predictable pattern; the grunting and the guttural screams, filled with rage and pain; the thud of metal boots, running this way and that across the slick earth.
Personal Essays
On Saltburn and Evil People
I am ready to stop pretending I don't have Evil inside me. I said the other week that 'unhinged' is really just another word for free - and I meant it. The more unhinged (by my standards) actions I have been taking, the more I feel closer to freedom. Which is a lofty goal in a world predicated on us Needing to feel like Good People, scared of capital-P Punishment if we don't abide by the rules. But Whose rules, exactly? Yours? Mine? Your Neighbour's? Coworker's? The Bible *praying hands emoji*? Jesus wasn't perfect. His message is Unconditional Love regardless of perfection, because none of us can ever achieve perfection. No matter how much we pray, no matter how many 'good deeds' we do, no matter how much we force ourselves to 'repent' for actions we're not fully sorry we took. [Please see @aaya.samadhi for understanding on how living according to avoiding sin and fearing Hell drives us away from connection and further into Freeze in our nervous systems.]
How I Forced Myself To Let Go Of My Ex After A Year Of Holding On
I broke up with my ex, high, while camping, on our exactly 2.5 year anniversary. I had not previously loved anyone to the depths I loved him, nor had I had a relationship in which I felt fulfilled in so many ways. Personality-wise, we are extremely compatible. Even looking at our birth charts - Capricorn/Aquarius galore, the both of us. I used to describe him as a male version of myself.
Creative Writing
Epitaph Pt. 2
<33 As promised
Epitaph
CW: trauma, abuse, child sexual abuse, domestic violence, grief, addiction, suicidal ideation, religion, finances