Music
WIP
Where do I even begin? Is it the primal wound of being abandoned? Misunderstood? Absolutely fucking alone in your thoughts, beliefs, and feelings - left to wade through them all on your own
Fuck that's boring already.
I feel alone in seeing how much we are repressing. I feel alone in uncaging myself. I know people are doing it, but they're not here, holding me. It feels like I am doing this work without a single person to look me in the eyes, hold me, and tell me I'm not crazy, and actually understand it and mean it. I'm not being ironic when I say I believe I'm an alien. I'm getting so tired of holding something that feels so sacred on my fucking OWN.
Twin Flame love, or whatever the fuck you wanna call it on any given day, is not for the fucking weak. Living your life with an aching, agonizing, empty fucking black hole inside your chest because you feel like you are missing part of you and like part of you is missing you,
What a mess we made, babe
You growling with how much you wanted it
But then I made a mess too big to clean up alone
And you left
Again
Did you fuck her just to hurt me?
Hold her head down while holding my name like a prayer
Red hair setting fire to your /flaming around you
Bury yourself in the back of her throat, seedless
Calling her a dirty whore
Punishing her transgressions
Since you couldn't punish me for mine
As if it wasn't enough you didn't fight
Calling my brother a bad guy
Meanwhile, keeping me locked in your mind
As you lay with her
Slow burn me in the right ways
Spit roast me under your gaze
Wow, she did cocaine off your cock?
Did her body become possessed like a wild fucking dog?
Like mine did, begging for you to let me in
And let me out of this cage
Woof
Raw fucking hunger
You love your messy baby
Until it makes your stomach turn
She can slit your throat
Make you gloat
But God forbid a girl offer to sacrifice a goat
Then you run
I'm wrong a lot too
Don't have all the answers
But I'm looking to start searching
With someone who wants to
You have ripped teeth out for me
The sun melts
The ice warms
The water trickles down
Hello, Shame, my Old Friend
I'm sorry I come back around with promises I can't keep/you won't let me keep
What a storm we created, baby
Each time, Spiralling deeper
Will we catch up to each other?
Are we meant to?
Did we prove what we set out to?
That you can leave me just like I left you
Titans and boxsprings
For someone who's searching for me too
You can't use me until you see me as the Queen I am
But then, it's not using, is it?
I'm just a junkie like my mother
Just an obsessive avoidant like my father
You can't stand that I want him, can you?
Could you ever measure up?
That's for you to show me, babe
Throat raw from you
Speckled like a vision
I don't want indulgence anymore
I want a real fucking decision
Talk so rich that you come off poor
Talk is cheap, open your mouth, whore
I already know my words are stuck in your brain
I am water and you are rain
But do they penetrate as deep as they can?
Stream of consciousness
Flow
Soul to Soul
No more translating
Live in the snow globe if you want
Night after night, stroking your cock
Reliving moments of me
While I break the glass of this miniature house